Thursday, January 20, 2011

On-Line Love Stories

I am a firm believer that when you are ready to attract love into your life, you should be willing to put as much energy into finding IT as you would looking for a new job. That includes putting on-line dating onto your agenda.

I know. I know. I hear complaints everyday from my clients and friends about their experiences from On-line dating. I’ve heard it all. “The guys are just gross.” “All of the people I have met on-line are losers.” “I never meet anyone compatible with me on-line.”

Well, if you keep having that negative perspective, that is exactly what you will get – gross losers who are not compatible with you. Whatever energy and thoughts that put out there is exactly what you will get back.

I have news for you: If you believe that you deserve to have love in your life, then love is what you will get. You just have to find a way to believe it deep down inside of yourself.

The fact is that every year hundreds of thousands of people find love on-line. So, if this statistic is a FACT, why should you not be included?

Read these love stories that developed online. Hopefully they will inspire you to get back online – or shift your perspective.

I married the love of my life this past February, after we met online in September 2008. I had been on OKCupid for about 3 weeks, and my husband who never used an online dating site was on the site about 10 minutes. He hadn’t even finished his profile when I sent him a message. We chatted on Yahoo IM for countless hours before we met in person 3 days later.

I was 47 at the time and he was 42. We’d both been married before and both swore we’d never do it again. Only when you meet the person of your dreams, things change. We are both happier than we’ve ever been in our lives, and have no problem with anyone knowing we met online. My husband is the man I dreamed of my whole life but never thought even existed. I am filled with gratitude every single day that I found him and he loves me.

My husband and I met online at the “turn of the century” (2000), long before internet dating was as popular as it is today. Because we lived in different towns, we corresponded by email for a few months before actually meeting face to face. Shortly thereafter we got engaged, and we’ll be celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary in April of next year.

Our friends and family were skeptical at first, and my brother even teased me about it in his toast at our wedding. But I guess we were just ahead of our time. We were absolutely made for each other, and we are certain we would never have met any other way. By the way, I was in my late 30′s and he was in his mid-40′s when we first met, so it is possible to find love online at any age!

My husband & I met on almost 9 years ago & have been happily married 6 years. It’s one of those blessed relationships that just keeps getting better – more fun, more love-filled. I was 45 y.o. at the time we met & had never been married. Dale had been married and divorced twice. Neither of us were good risks statistically. The internet really helped us wade through a lot of people who weren’t good matches for us. For instance, we both wanted people who didn’t drink which isn’t that common. Dale tells the story of receiving 10 possible matches meeting his criteria & then prioritizing them. Fortunately, I ended up at the top of the list. From his very first email that said nothing more than “Hey Miss Josey Lee, check me out. I’m Plant Man,” I had a special feeling about him. We wrote & spoke by phone, met 3 weeks later, and the rest is history. I got onto Match because I listened to a friend and my intuition. I wasn’t at all excited about it and never expected to meet anyone, expecially not my true love. Match didn’t work for my friend, however, because she wasn’t truly open & ready (still hung up on an unavailable man.)

Hi, I met my current partner, on-line two years ago. I had recently come out of a 10-year relationship, and joined, and within two weeks, met the man I am going to marry. Zac lived in Puerto Vallarta, at the time, and I had seen him on a trip I had taken to Puerto Vallarta while I was on Chemistry. I didn’t know it was him, and he didn’t know it was me. We met on line a few days later when I returned home to San Francisco – he emailed me, when he saw my ad. We still didn’t know we had seen each other. Within two weeks of meeting on-line, and Skyping for several hours a night, we also found out that we had lived across the street from each other when we lived in Seattle, that he had waited on me at a restaurant, and that one of my employees was best friends with his brother-in-law’s best friend. It was like we were meant to meet. Since then, a month after we met, I moved to Mexico with him for a year, and we just recently moved back to the States, and now live together in Dallas.

I live in Los Angeles, where it is notoriously difficult to meet people out in the “real world” if you’re over 30. So, in 2001, I decided to dismiss the stigmas attached to online dating and gave it a shot. I tried it on and off for about four years, met some nice guys (not a creep among them, one became one of my best friends) and had some short-term relationships. Two months out of being in a truly horrendous, year-long relationship with someone I had known for a very long time, I decided to get back online.

One of the first emails I got was a beautifully written, personalized, properly punctuated and spell-checked email. I looked at his profile; it said very little about who he was, though it was kind of witty. Worse still, there were three photos—–one of him in something like a medieval Viking mask with his arms up in the air, the second of him far away and in a group and in the third he was in in profile, with sunglasses on and holding the end of (gasp) what looked to be a beer bong! My first thought, “Meat head.” But I didn’t send him my stock rejection response, I just let it sit in my inbox for a month. When I reread it I thought, “This guy is definitely smart and articulate, and that counts for a lot in my book.” So I wrote him back, asking him some pointed questions and requested a REAL photo. I recall sitting at work, watching the picture load and seeing these breath-taking feline green eyes appear! The long-and-short of it is, he turned out to be a true gentleman, intelligent, kind, romantic and much more, and we’ve been together for over five years, married for two and a half. And I was only his sixth online date…..

Hi – here’s our story, and what a great one it is: About five years ago I took another guy to a black tie-optional event. He was still hungry after a few hours of nibbling on hors d’oeuvres, so he suggested we go to (I’m not kidding) Denny’s. As I sat across from him in Denny’s , watching him eat his Moon over My Hammy while I was still wearing my floor-length black Armani gown and custom-made cashmere coat, I vowed that I would never date again. Then six months later I briefly snuck out of dating retirement to meet one more guy who seemed too good to be true. Either way, this was really my very last date. I would either marry him or retire permanently. I was 48 at the time, single for almost 15 years, and had had enough.

In my heart of hearts, my dream guy would be a widower who had been happily married. And, he had to be 6’6”, since I am 6’2”. What were the odds? So imagine my surprise when I met Mike, 6’8” (he played basketball for VA Tech back in the ‘70’s), who had lost his wife of nearly 30 years. I was his first phone call, his first date and his first kiss. Ten days later he got off of the online dating site and said he wanted to see where we went. We married three years ago this past October and we are still ecstatically happy – and a symbol of hope to all of our family and friends.

If you missed my article on the Do’s and Don’ts of On-line Dating see previous article.

Love, Eris